


Heart vs Head (Hamilton College AU)

by CloverlovesHamilton



Category: Hamilton - Fandom
Genre: First work - Freeform, Homophobia Warning, laf is nb - Freeform, there will be angst, what is this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-04 04:25:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11547444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloverlovesHamilton/pseuds/CloverlovesHamilton
Summary: some random thing I decided to start.basically just a hellhole of shipping and angst





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Im sorry this is short.

John Laurens awoke to a loud banging at his bedroom door.   
"What..?" he groaned, rubbing sleep from his eyes.   
"Thought you said you'd be gone by today." His father's sharp tone took a moment to register with him. Then he remembered.  
"Right. Sorry..." he hesitated. "Mr Laurens."   
It felt odd, using his own surname to address his father, or rather, the man who used to be his father. He got up, and changed into a plain white t-shirt and sparkly grey tracksuit pants. After adjusting his rainbow flag pin, he threw on a cardigan and opened the door, every movement racking his body with pain. He stumbled over the suitcase that had been deliberately placed in front of his door.  
"Fuck.." he muttered, regaining balance.  
His father was waiting by the front door. Henry Laurens was not a particularly menacing man in any aspect. He was quite short, and somewhat pudgy. But to John, he was someone to be feared. The scars on his arms reminded him of that every day.  
"Should I drive you?" Henry's tone was dull and bored sounding. John shook his head.  
"I'll take a taxi. I seem to have exhausted my time here already." He responded bitterly.  
And with that, he stepped out of the house, and shut the door. Pulling out his phone, he called his boyfriend, and sat down on the kerb.  
“Hey.” said John into the phone.  
“Hi. Time for me to pick you up?”  
“Yeah.”  
“I’ll be there soon.”  
John hung up, and waited. His hands ached to draw something, but he knew they’d bleed if he even tried. So he just sat and stared at the asphalt, trying to keep his mind off the last few days.

After what seemed like forever, a silver Honda drove up and parked in front of the house. John jumped up, sending pain surging through his body.  
“Shit….” he hissed.   
A short boy with a silky dark ponytail got out of the car, and approached John, who threw himself into the boy’s arms.  
“Alex!” He exclaimed in delight.  
“Hi John.” Alex laughed.  
John spun him around, and everything seemed to fill with a golden light.   
“I love you Alex.” John said warmly.  
“I love you too.” Alex replied, leaning in. John shook his head hurriedly, pulling back.  
“Not now… my dad..” he hissed. Alex nodded.  
“Sorry, I forgot. Come on, let’s go.”  
Alex took John’s hand, and John wheeled the suitcase across the path.  
“You’re limping…” murmured Alex. John shrugged, and opened the car door.  
He didn’t expect to be met with a roar of noise.  
He looked at Alex questioningly, to which Alex just shrugged, a wide smile spreading across his face.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So basically i finally got an idea of what I want to happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont kill me, i dont know what I'm doing.  
> also apparently I am unable to write long chapters.

“JOHN!” Yelled Hercules, jumping out of the car. Alex laughed. Lafayette beamed, practically knocking John over with a bear hug. John winced, but hugged them back tight.  
“Hey now, let him breathe!” Laughed Herc. Lafayette grinned bashfully.  
“Sorry mon ami.” They apologised. John smiled. “It’s all good.”   
Alex grinned.   
“Come on you lot, get in the car!” he laughed, nudging John. John smiled, but he felt blood start to seep through his shirt. Praying Alex wouldn’t notice, he wheeled his suitcase around and heaved it into the boot of the car.   
“John?” Alex’s voice came from behind him.  
“Yeah?” Responded John.  
“You’re bleeding…” Alex sounded worried.  
“Oh.”  
“Why’re you bleeding?”  
John sighed.  
“Long story.” He looked up, the sky was dark and cloudy, a storm looming.  
Alex looked too, feeling a sense of dread fill his stomach, but he brushed it off.  
“Get in the car John..” he tried to hide the slight tremor in his voice. John nodded, and climbed into the passenger seat. Alex got into the car and started it up. 

As they drove, it started to rain. Alex looked kind of uncomfortable, but said nothing. The rain got harder, and thunder rumbled.  
“Alex, if you want, I can drive.” John offered. Alex shook his head.  
“Alex, I know how you are about storms..”  
Alex shook his head again. “It’s fine John.” He replied.  
The rain got harder still, and it was getting hard to keep the car driving in a straight line.   
Another car was coming up on the other side of the road. Alex stared ahead trying not to think about the rain. The other car got closer, and thunder rumbled once more.  
Lightning flashed, and a startled Alex lost control.  
The car skidded, collided with the other car and flipped on its side.  
The last thing Alex remembered was flashing lights and sirens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cLiFfHaNgEr
> 
> im sorry please love me


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it's so short.  
> I promise the next one will be longer.

James Madison woke up in a hospital bed. Looking around dazedly, he saw Thomas sitting in a chair beside his bed, expression miserable.  
“Wh-ere…?” he asked, voice trembling.   
Thomas’ face lit up.  
“Jemmy!” he exclaimed, “You’re awake!”   
James smiled groggily.  
“Ya-huh.”   
Thomas planted a kiss on his forehead, making James blush.  
“What happened..?” He asked, smile fading a little. Thomas’ expression darkened.  
“Some idiot freaked out and swerved across the road. I think they were worse off than us though.” He growled. “Serves them right. Jeez, the way that guy was driving. It’ll be a miracle if he’s even alive by the time I’m through with him.” He scowled.  
James shook his head.  
“Thomas, chill. I’m not badly hurt, nor are you. If they’re worse off than us, just be grateful that we’re okay. Don’t wish anything upon them.”  
Thomas grinned.  
“How is it you’re always so calm?” He asked. James smiled.  
“Magic.”  
Thomas laughed.

A few doors down, a heart monitor cut silent.  
Chaos ensued.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> there, a longer chapter

Alex woke up to doctors rushing in and out of a room and monitors in his room beeping. He tried to sit up but found he couldn't. Groaning, he sank back into the pillows, and looked around for a recognisable face.  
Then two people walked into his room, hand in hand. Alex craned his neck to see who they were, and felt a small smile spread across his face.   
"Alex!" Eliza beamed. Alex smiled at her.  
"Hi, Eliza. And..." He smiled at the other girl.   
"This is Maria," Eliza said, squeezing the other girl's hand.  
"Hi.." Maria said, glancing at Eliza, who gave her a reassuring smile. Eliza sat in one of the chairs by Alex's bed and gestured for Maria to do the same. She sat beside Eliza, reaching for her hand again.   
"So.. have you gone to see John yet?" Alex asked.  
Eliza hesitated and then shook her head.  
"No. We.." she paused. "We were planning on seeing him earlier, but the doctors wouldn't let us."   
Eliza hated lying. She thought it was wrong, that it only caused trouble. But she felt like she had no other choice in this situation, not now at least.  
"But didn't-" Maria started. Eliza quickly cut her off.  
"But Laf seems to be well enough, just sort of shocked." 

Alex gave her a weary smile.  
"That's good. They always seem to be good at dealing with stuff like this." He mused, and Eliza nodded. Maria frowned but didn't object. Alex smiled at her.  
"How do you know 'Liza?" He asked.  
"Well.. she's my girlfriend." She smiled a little. Alex beamed.  
"That's great." Alex grinned. Eliza gave him a don't-you-dare-bring-it-up-look. Alex chuckled.  
"I dated 'Liza for a while." he started. Eliza groaned.  
"Did you?" asked Maria. "You two are pretty close for an ex-couple, as far as I can tell." she mused. Alex chuckled.

"Yeah. But I'm warning you now, when she says she'll be ten minutes, be prepared to wait half an hour."  
Maria cracked a smile.  
"I'm pretty sure most girls are just like that." She said, and Alex shrugged.   
"I'm dating John," he said with a grin. Eliza bit her lip.  
"But I thought-" Maria said. Alex blinked.  
"What?" he frowned.   
"I thought Laf wanted us to come back," Eliza interjected. "Didn't they say they wanted us to help them with Herc?" Maria nodded.   
"Oh yeah." she stood up, and Eliza followed suit.  
"Seeya later Alex." she said.  
"Bye." said Maria.  
Alex grinned.   
"See you! Tell me if they let you see John, okay?" he said.  
Eliza felt her chest tighten.  
"Sure."


	5. Chaper 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry

Dr. Hansen had delivered this news to many people, many times before. She couldn't understand why this felt different. The news always filled her with dread and a feeling of uselessness but never this... this was something new. For the first time, she felt as though she shouldn't be telling someone. But she pressed ahead anyway. Opening the door to the young man's room, she silently begged he would be asleep. But he was awake, and he looked up at her with sparkling, hopeful brown eyes. She gritted her teeth.  
"Hello.." she said. The guy beamed at her.  
"Hi! You are the doc treating John, aren't you?" He asked. She nodded.  
"Yes.."   
The man smiled wider.   
"Nice to meet you!" he said brightly. "How's he doing, anyway..?"   
Dr. Hansen bit her lip.  
"Well..." she started. The guy's smile faltered a little.  
She took a deep breath.   
"I'm sorry.. but..." This was harder than ever. "He passed away early this morning..." 

The look of horror that crossed the man's face made her regret everything. His eyes filled with tears, and he was clearly fighting them back.  
"N-no!" He protested. "He c-can't have...! Yo-you're lying!" he yelled. She dipped her head.  
"I'm sorry."  
The guy let out a heart-wrenching sob.   
"No!" he wailed. "NONONONONONONONONONO"  
Dr. Hansen silently left the room.

Alex couldn't believe it. John couldn't be dead. He just... couldn't. He stared down at his hands, vision blurred by tears. This couldn't be happening. The one person who'd always cared, the one person who was always at his side...   
Gone.  
"Why..." he whispered. "Why is the world so cruel to me.."


End file.
